Where You Are Matters As Much As What You Are

Where you are matters.

Look no further than the first rule of real estate: location, location, location.

It’s easy to see how a high rise in Manhattan might go for way more than a high rise in Muncie, Indiana.

There’s high demand in NY. There are more people. There’s more money. There’s a higher premium on status.

The same is true for your career.

Where you are matters. 

If you’re out panhandling your skills in a market that doesn’t need them, you’re cheating yourself out of major opportunities.

Find the place that can satisfy the type of work opportunities you want. Go there.

The especially beautiful thing about the world we live in today, though, is that your work isn’t limited to physical space. The marvel of the internet is that it offers most anyone the ability to transmute their skills into value for other people all over the world.

So if it’s not a question of location for work, does it still matter?

ABSOFUCKINGLUTELY.

Where you are matters. It sets the backdrop of your day to day life. Where you are helps foster (or inhibit) your personal growth.

Think about it in a simple comparison: Are you living near the Dead Sea or in the Amazon Basin?

The former won’t support any vegetation. The latter is one of the most dense areas of vegetative growth in the world.

Which one describes where you’re at?

If your physical space doesn’t support your growth, maybe it’s time to move on.

The Power of the Double Thank You

The best transactions involve a double thank you.

Maybe you’re at a coffee shop. You place your order and swipe your card. The barista replies, “thank you.” When she delivers your cup of coffee, you echo back, “thank you.”

The barista is better off with your cash. You’re better off with your coffee.

The double thank you isn’t about niceties. It’s about choosing to engage in the world as a positive sum game. Both parties walk away from an exchange improved by the exchange.

The power of a double thank you can be applied to all walks of life. It’s not just about exchanging money for goods or services. The same mindset is powerful for relationships and all human interactions.

Imagine for a moment if every interaction you participated in, both you and the other person walked away better off. Can you truthfully say that’s the case? If yes, then congratulations Mister Holier Than Thou. If not, maybe there’s an opportunity to reevaluate how you engage with the world.

Again, it’s not about niceties. We all have a choice of how we choose to engage with the world and with others. And today, I’m reminding myself to reach for mutually beneficial encounters.

Thank you.

From What I Need to What I Can Do For You.

The job market is not as scary as it seems if you’re willing to change your approach.

The easy approach is scouring job boards with a mindset that “I need an job” and blasting out resumes with generic cover letters. The mindset behind this usually overemphasizes the need.

But – this enhances the difficulty level of finding a job. Businesses don’t give two shits about your needs as an applicant. That’s harsh. But it’s true. They can’t afford to hire, let alone pay people on the basis of needs.

Instead of focusing on your needs – when applying, you should focus on how you can help a business meet its needs. How you can bring value to the enterprise.

Behind every business is a person or group of people. They all have needs, too. They all have families. They all have bills to pay. But if the business doesn’t make money, none of that matters.

So businesses look for ways to maximize the value of their time and dollars. This is especially true when it comes to hiring. Evaluating a candidate is often an evaluation of opportunity costs. In other words, everything a business says yes to means several things it says no to.

Consider a simple scenario:

A business needs help with bookkeeping, office management, and marketing. It has a $50k annual budget for these.

Sally has a family and a high rent. She needs to make at least $50k per year, but she has 10 years experience in a narrow range of skills. She also isn’t interested in learning new things. If the business hires Sally for $50k and she can only do bookkeeping and manage the office, it still needs someone to assist with marketing.

April is fresh out of college. Somehow she managed to walk out without debt. She doesn’t need a lot to live on and at this phase in her career she values experience more than money. She’s got some basic skills and an eagerness to learn. If the business hires April for $35k and she can take on some of the marketing and is willing to manage the office, then it still has $15k in the budget to go out and find bookkeeping help.

This isn’t meant to be a perfect thought experiment. It’s intended to paint a picture of the choices business face when they hire – and contrast the difference between an applicant’s needs and an applicant’s ability and willingness to create value.

It should be obvious that hiring the younger, eager, less expensive candidate and finding a creative solution for the other tasks is a better decision for the business.

It’s often easy on the job market to overlook that businesses are made up of people. It’s also easy to put too much emphasis on your immediate circumstances.

Fight the impulse. Instead, find a way to focus on the needs of the business.

 

If Your Friends Call You Crazy, Don’t Sweat It

“I’m not going to law school.”

When I first told a friend what I planned to do, he asked if I needed clinical help.

“I don’t want to wait around,” I said. “I hate sitting in a classroom and I want to start something now.”

Before the words even left my mouth I knew we were on different wavelengths. 

He had just finished his first year at one of the most prestigious law schools in the country. His course was charted already. He was comfortable in it. I wasn’t. I didn’t know what I wanted.

I needed a big challenge and I wanted something that sounded impressive to me. That’s it. 

I felt confident I could scratch those itches cheaper. I hated the idea of amassing a huge debt load in exchange for 3.5 years of suffering in an artificially-lit lecture hall. Even the lucrative salary prospect didn’t bring me comfort. 

I was searching for a solution. It didn’t have to pay big. But it had to be exciting. It had to challenge me. And it had to lead to something I felt worthy of my time and energy.

To be continued…

Act Versus Tact

Your gut will often be right.
But excited, with prudence guts fight.
You’ll rush a decision.
Forsaking precision.
Because first can feel just like foresight.
But should ye learn when to pause
To consider your cause
Good fortune will outdo your plight!

Act Versus Tact, a poem:

Your gut will often be right.
But excited, with prudence guts fight.
You’ll rush a decision.
Forsaking precision.
Because first can feel just like foresight.
But should ye learn when to pause
To consider your cause
Good fortune will outdo your plight!

10 Small Goals.

No timelines. No expectations. Just a short list of small personal goals.

I struggle setting realistic goals.

When I don’t live up to the expectations I get disappointed in myself. Then I’m too hard on myself. So I set even more outlandish goals to compensate for missing the goals.

Hell, sometimes I just set too many goals. Or I set them and lose interest. Or I get in a rut. Or I forget about them.

Goals can be great. There’s nothing like crossing a big goal off a list. Or they can kill you if you don’t keep them in check.

So I’m trying something new. No timelines. No expectations. Just a short list of small personal goals.

I believe today each goal below will add happiness to my life. I may complete them. I may replace them with different goals. These are what I’m contemplating today.

10 Small Goals:

  • Learn to crack an egg with one hand. Because I enjoy cooking and want to make fewer messes.
  • Bench press 225 pounds 10x in one set. Because I want to get back in peak shape and this one will take commitment.
  • Write 5 thank you notes. Because I would like to practice gratitude.
  • Perform an act of service for a stranger for nothing in return. Because I’d like to work on compassion.
  • Meditate once per day for 5 minutes (for 5 days). Because I’d like to get better at understanding my emotions.
  • Entertain conversation without arguing with someone with a different point of view. Because I would like to get better at listening.
  • Journal about something that made me laugh or something that made someone else laugh. Because life’s more fun when I’m not taking myself so seriously.
  • Journal about something I’m struggling with and publish it. Because I’m convinced the best writing is honest – and I’d like to work on that.
  • Journal about something that inspires optimism and excites me and publish it. Because it sounds fun.
  • Journal descriptively about a happy memory. Because I want to.

 

 

 

 

Gym Rat

Are you done with that bench or can I have a turn? I’ve been waiting all day to get on my burn.

I’m tryna get strong because inside I feel weak. But pretending it won’t take me months ’til I peak.

If you don’t like what you see in the mirror, lean muscles don’t hurt, but neither does beer.

In the gym like in life consistency rules; also true is that you’ll meet lots of tools.

The most you can hope for is not to be one and to always remember life’s best when it’s fun.

Masquerade.

Put on your mask. Hide underneath.

Else others will see you. They’ll see that you bleed.

 

Dress up. Choose your costume. Conceal your real name.

Then no one can stop you from fortune or fame.

 

Hide as anonymous. One lost in the crowd.

Control who gets glimpses. Even then only shrouds.

 

Deny all your struggles. Lie about your pain.

Others will see them. That’s unwanted shame.

 

Hide from the horror of losing what’s loved.

If they see your true colors. They’ll leave you. They’ll run.

 

The mask is the safest. A tested disguise.

Though you can see past it might trick others’ eyes.

 

Masks grant perfection; protection from pain.

A shield to your weakness; an umbrella in rain.

 

Hide from your feelings and abstracts like love.

Keep the world beneath you. And let nothing above.

 

So put on your mask. Don’t you dare take it off.

Or the world will hurt you. And hurting will cost.

——

 

If I take off the mask I’ll stand so exposed.

The truth to confront from my head to my toes.

 

This mask cages demons. It’s darkness, despair.

Yet I long for the sunshine, the wind in my hair.

 

I. DON’T. WANT. THIS. MASK!

The world must see. This is who I am.

And my soul must break free.

 

— M.E.

2016 and counting…

During this time I’ve gained exposure to all the nitty-gritty business of doing business. I’ve also come to recognize the brilliance of people passionate at work to create solutions. I’ve seen the trenches and served on the frontline of what I consider to be a great entrepreneurial endeavor.

I moved 1,200 miles across the country this year, but it hardly captures the ground I’ve made.

I’m a (human) gestation period through a yearlong personal and professional development program. (See Praxis). Since January, I’ve been apprenticing under the Founder & CEO of a tech/accounting startup–which recently closed a $4.2M Series A funding round. (See Ceterus). I’ve experienced unprecedented growth as part of both. It’s been the most difficult, stressful, chaotic, roller coaster ride I’ve ever taken. These have also been the most rewarding, invigorating, fulfilling, and actualizing months of my life.

During this time I’ve gained exposure to all the nitty-gritty business of doing business. I’ve also come to recognize the brilliance of people passionate at work to create solutions. I’ve seen the trenches and served on the frontline of what I consider to be a great entrepreneurial endeavor. I’ve experienced a few victories. And I’ve come to know defeat. I see both as allies for learning now.

I’ve never felt more limber than I have these few months. I’ve never felt more open to possibility.

In the past six months, I’ve:


This is merely a snapshot of the things I’ve been doing. It hardly does justice to all the learning that’s been happening behind the scenes. It’s been an incredible journey so far.

I couldn’t summarize what it’s taken to get here.

There have been many long hours, late nights, and early mornings. There have been whole days where I felt like I was banging my head against the wall. There have been weekends where I didn’t turn the lights on or leave my apartment and stayed glued to the couch, entirely spent. There have been dozens of late-night ice cream and beer errands.

There have also been some of the brightest, happiest, and most hopeful hours of my life. There have been dozens of “Aha!” moments. There have been countless small victories with violent fist pumps and silent cheers.

And there has been an incredible support network beside me through Praxis, my family, co-workers, and friends.

2016 has been monumental already. I look forward to sharing all that precipitates in the coming months as I continue to grow.

As always, thanks for reading.

Best,

M.E.